A new Time Magazine article explores the age old issues of favoritism within families and concludes it is universal and inevitable. A large-scale study showed 70% of parents showed a preference for one child. We all want to be fair and equal. How can this be true?
Birth order, gender, physical or psychological traits and simple personality chemistry come into play. We all just like some types of people more than others. Sibling rivalry and passion as well as the quality of the parents relationship are also a factor, as well as the stress a family my be undergoing. Healthy families will minimize the effects on their children and show no overt favoritism. Quote “the effort it takes to pretend it is not so can itself be an act of love.” If this effort is not made, psychological damage will result to the rejected child’s sense of self and even effect their adult partner choice. Children are concrete. Make all things and time spent equal.
Many therapy hours are spent undoing the effects of favoritism.(It is very fixable!). You must acknowledge and accept how you feel, but prevent the injuries before they occur. All chidren need equal unconditional love.
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